Friday, 22 January 2010

Off Sick Again

Wednesday was extremely stressful at work. There is a bug going round the ward, and we have some patients in isolation. Running between rooms, taking obs, 5 sets of aprons and gloves, I felt like a hesdless chicken. Delayed train on the way home, finally got in, felt a bit sick, went to bed. Woke up at 4am and spent an hour kneeling in front of the toilet bowl. Havn't actually been sick, but have felt it, and couldn't eat all of yesterday. Had some food today, still feel a bit nauseous. Could just be somatic? Me, attention seeking mental and that jazz.

In better news, have got a letter offering me the Honours degree, and will be accepting. Now, I just need to get into good enouh shape to return to work.

Have lost 7 pounds in the two weeks. Not quite sure how.

Want to lose more, always the same, a little bit slips off and you think how much better you looked at under 100 pounds. Ha. Although you kept fainting and getting ill.

I don't like this placement. New mentor is actually a brilliant nurse though. It's just the general running of the ward, money seems to be extremely tight. Havn't really thought much about the money side of things on the ward before, aside from cab fares and expenses for activities or outings.

I suppose ending up sitting across the table from Grandad's consultant didn't help. I was so tense, felt like if I relaxed I'd end up shaking him by the shoulders, why didn't you help him? Why did he have to die? The only one who understood me, the one I am most like. I see his moods in Little Brother, and pray it's just the start of teenage angst. I'd give anything for him not to have to go through this.

No comments: